Mindfulness and Why You Should Try It

Updated: Dec 23, 2020

Table of Contents

• Why You Should Try Mindfulness

• What Is Mindfulness?

• What Mindfulness is Not

  • Having a Blank Mind

  • Not Feeling Emotions

  • Ignoring Pain or Difficulties

• How Does Mindfulness Help?

• Mindfulness Techniques You Can Try at Home

  • Notice Your Current Activity

  • Notice Your Hand

  • Try a Meditation Video, Podcast or App

• Learn Mindfulness with FP Counselling

• References

A common concern I receive from new clients is the fact that they do not want to be given mindfulness exercises and be sent home after a session. While I agree that mindfulness may not be for everyone, I usually tell people I cannot promise I won’t give them these types of exercises to practice at home. This is because there are good reasons as to why mindfulness is useful, and why it has a place in treating a variety of mental health concerns. I wanted to de-mystify some of the common beliefs about mindfulness, and to explain how and why it may be helpful.

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is an ancient practice with roots in Buddhism. In the 1990s, researchers began to discover its usefulness in therapy when working with clients with very intense emotions. More recently, different therapy modalities have begun to include mindfulness practice as a way of helping clients cope with a variety of difficulties. Therefore, the word mindfulness has increasingly become part of our every day vocabulary. Unfortunately, there sometimes is a misconception about what mindfulness actually means, which is important to clear up. 

Being mindful does not mean that one needs to meditate for hours in a quiet room, and it does not require any special skills and/or equipment. Germer (2004) defined mindfulness as the ability to recognize what is happening in the present moment, and to fully relate to our experiences, whether they are positive, negative or neutral. In fact, in order to practice mindfulness, there are three important components: 

1. awareness,

2. of present experience,

3. with acceptance.

With the previous definition in mind, it is possible to say that there are many different exercises that would be considered “mindful.” While our Western definition of formal meditation may be one mindful activity, we can also find the time to be mindful in small events throughout our day. For example, it is easy to find ourselves being mindless while we drive home from work. Rather than being grounded and mindful of the present moment, we could be thinking about the endless to-do list that we need to tackle when we arrive home, or we could be re-playing in our mind a negative event that happened at work that day. An example of being mindful while driving, would be to focus on what we are doing, how the steering wheel feels in our hands, notice what you are feeling in that moment, without judging your experience.

If you think that we can help you develop the skills necessary to live a more mindful life, book a free 20-minute phone consultation to speak to us and see if we’re a good fit.

What Mindfulness is Not

I have found that part of the reason why some clients are hesitant to try mindfulness exercises is because there is a lot of misconceptions about what it entails, as well as its purpose. Below are some of the most common concerns I hear:

1. Mindfulness does not mean to have a blank mind

   Instead, mindfulness is about training our minds to become aware of what we think about and when. Therefore, I tell my clients that is ok to have thoughts pop into their minds as they are doing any mindfulness exercise. They key aspect of being mindful is becoming aware of these thoughts without judging them.

2. Mindfulness does not mean that we stop feeling emotions.

   This is a common misconception, the fact that being mindful allows us not to feel any difficult emotions. In fact, the purpose of mindfulness is to become open to the experience of any emotions that come up, to welcome them, and accept them the way they are. The ability to be aware of our emotions allows us to learn how to cope with it, rather than distracting ourselves through other means such as social media or TV.

3. The purpose of mindfulness is not to take our minds off of our pain or difficulties in life.

   Rather, it is to openly turn to these experiences and accept them. When we do this consistently, our capacity to deal with painful thoughts and emotions increases. A consistent mindfulness practice also allows us to better understand how reacting to pain with resistance, avoidance and protest is what causes much of our suffering, and that acceptance can actually bring us relief.

How Does Mindfulness Help?

The effectiveness of mindfulness practice has been studied with a number of different psychological concerns. For example, studies have shown that engaging in a mindfulness practice can help reduce stress, depression, anxiety, rumination, and can help with emotional regulation. Researchers believe that mindfulness helps by increasing people’s metacognition, which increases their ability to disengage from negative experiences. 

Furthermore, mindfulness can change the way in which we react to negative experiences at the brain level. MRI studies have found that when confronted with a negative experience, the brain of participants who had engaged in a mindfulness program activated areas that are associated with more positive coping. Furthermore, it took these participants less time to come back to a calmer emotional baseline after a negative emotionally arousing experience. Researchers argue that mindfulness allows us to disengage from emotionally upsetting events quicker, and re-focus our attention on being able to cope with the situation. 

This is only a small portion of the research that supports the usefulness of mindfulness in therapy. There are many studies showing its effectiveness with specific disorders or concerns, such as ADHD, Borderline Personality Disorder, depression, anxiety, PTSD, chronic pain, among others. Mindfulness can be a central tool in lessening the effect of very intense emotions and/or psychological pain, which is why many therapists recommend it to their clients. 

Mindfulness Techniques You Can Try at Home

Now that you know a little bit about how mindfulness can help you feel better, here are a few things you can try at home. I have listed them from the simplest of exercises to the more complex ones.

1. Notice Your Current Activity

This is perhaps the simplest way to ground yourself and become mindful throughout the day. I will go through it with the example of brushing your teeth, but this can be done with any activity.

Bring your attention to the present moment, first, notice your body. Bring your attention not the feeling of your feet making contact with the cold floor, feel the texture of the floor with them. Then bring your attention to the rest of your body, are there any particular sensations present?

Perhaps you are feeling worried about all the things you need to do tomorrow, or feeling accomplished about what you have achieved throughout the day. Whatever the sensation, welcome it and accept it, simply notice what it feels like in your body and where.

Then turn your attention to the toothbrush in your hand. Is it a smaller toothbrush? Or a bigger one that occupies most of your palm? What color is it? Does the handle have any textures that you can notice? Then, as you bring the toothbrush to your mouth, notice the feeling of the toothpaste as it makes contact with your teeth. As you begin to brush, notice what that feels like for your teeth. Are there any thoughts that come to your mind about the day ahead, if so, accept them, without judging them, and then return your attention to the feeling of brushing your teeth.

Keep going through this exercise until you are done brushing your teeth.

2. Notice Your Hand

It may help to set a timer for 5 minutes before you begin. Sit in a comfortable position, and put up one of your hands, palm upward. Hold it at a comfortable distance from your face. Spend a couple of minutes observing your hand with curiosity, as if it was the first time you see it. Notice the shape of it, the colour of your skin and how it may change depending on the spot, notice the lines and patterns that these make.

Notice your thoughts while you do this, are any of them judgement? If they are, simply acknowledge them, and then continue to notice your hand. Flip your hand over, notice how the skin is different, notice your fingernails, and the cuticles surrounding it. Close your hand into a fist, and notice how the texture of the skin changes, notice any color changes as well. If any judgements come into your mind about blemishes or scars, again, notice them and remain curious about them, then go back to noticing your hand.

Keep doing this until your timer ends.

3. Try a meditation video, podcast, or app:

You may have to search around for a type of meditation that you like. Some people enjoy guided meditations, while others enjoy just setting up a timer and sitting in silence. If you are a beginner, a short guided meditation may help. You can increase the time of your meditation as you get more comfortable with it. Below are some that I like for beginners:

In just 5 minutes you can reset your day in a positive way.

This 10 minute Daily Calm mindfulness meditation helps you powerfully restore and re-connect with the present.

In terms of podcasts, I like “Guided Meditations” by The Yoga Bunny. She has a 10-day mindfulness program, as well as a few other guided meditations such as “Mindful Eating.” I also liked the podcast “21 Day Positive Mindfulness Meditation Challenge” by Kendal Maxwell. You can find either of these in Spotify or Apple Podcasts. 

Mindfulness apps are also becoming increasingly popular. Some of the most well known ones are Headspace and Calm. I also enjoy Insight Timer.  

Although mindfulness is not be a silver bullet for curing all mental health concerns, it can be an important tool to lessen the suffering associated with negative experiences. Furthermore, it is a tool that does not require a big time commitment or any specific skills or equipment. All that is needed is your willingness to set up a few minutes of your day to focus on the present moment. Even five minutes every day can make a big difference in your overall wellbeing.

Learn to Become Mindful with FP Counselling

If you find that you’re you need some help learning to become more mindful in order to reduce stress, depression, anxiety and address how you react to negative experiences, FP Counselling offers free 20-minute consultations to see if we might be a good fit to help you do that, and we would be more than happy to speak with you to see how we can support you in building and practicing those skills. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation with us:

References: 

Davis, D. M., & Hayes, J. A. (2011). What are the benefits of mindfulness? A practice review of psychotherapy-related research. American Psychological Association, 48 (2), 198-208. 

Germer, C. (2004). What is mindfulness? Insight Journal, Fall 24-29. 

Harris, R. (2019). ACT Made Simple. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

Koons, C. R. (2016). The Mindfulness Solution for Intense Emotions: Take control of Borderline Personality Disorder with DBT. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

Siegel, R. D., Germer, C., & Olendzki, A. (2008). Mindfulness: What is it? Where does it come from? In Didonna, F. (Ed.), Clinical Handbook of Mindfulness, pp. 17-36. New York, US: Springer.